The education of the masses part 1 - case 133

I thought rather than going back to the begining of the when and why's I jumped in as an advocate for childrens rights start with the here and now. I sat on a phone with a nice fellow discussing his case. Average guy that meets all your psychological norms tests, good dad and works everyday. One of the first things I noticed from the first of the conversation that this gentleman was worried after meeting with his laywer. He like alot of men I encounter doing this is he said here is my laywers name and what do you think of him. I always try to not drill a laywer to bad because they say" Only a fool represents themselves". I think that should be changed to only a foolish judge thinks that a man without money can afford to pay the exsorbent cost of a laywer. He then asked that question well I just got served papers for primary residence, as he had looked after the child in that capcity since he and his ex seperated. The laywer that he spoke to forgot to mention things like status quo and parentus to him. So as all people that seem to call, education on the system was always the first place I have to start. Our system here in Canada has been on a downward spiral since around 1968 a year after we became a true country. The no fault divorce act as it has been deemed and the start of the destruction of the family and family value. So here is some of the beginings for people that choose to read this will understand.

We all have relationships some good, some bad and well statiscally 51% plus that result in marriage end in divorce. So if you have 10 close friends that are currently married in the first 5 years of it well they will go through this game of hell. So you ask how is that education, more of a little profescy of where you who read this may be someday. If your female, you stand a pretty good chance to take the fellow your with if you have children to the cleaners. If your male well stats that you can find 87% of custodial parents in this country are female. So looking at that you say well I have joint custody but who possesses the primary residence status. So lets take a look at the first part of a seperation.

So people grow apart, never were more than a chaser and a chasee, and well some just didn't do that main thing take a look at this person and with the quirks you both posess and say in 50 years will I be able to look at you the same way I did after the wedding night. Another key thing people go on ooh its my soul mate, fairy tale romance, well guess what they still are human and so are you. So when the fairy tale ends and reality sits in will you be able to say the same thing. Do you share common interests, do you like to do things together and still have that time for hanging with the guys or hanging with the girls. If your a parent then well that is limited especially when your kids are young. They grab alot of your attention and well are really demanding of your time. So now I painted a negative picture to some, the truth and reality to others. So I could go on what the back ground of relationships are like but when you read this an examine yours, hopefully your not calling me and saying what the hell did I do.

So in the begging of a seperation it usually goes with one person initiating it. Yes sad to say but from anywhere's you read even good ole cosmo, for the ladies, females initate the seperation. So generally from the 133 cases I have worked on over the last 10 years it is one cheated on the other, they were really better off as friends,one had deeper childhood psychologial issues that were never dealt with, and addictions, seem to top off the list as the most prevelant things I came accross. So then we as adults seperate, take a minute if you have a child and look in their eyes if your divorced and say did I hurt you when we broke up. They as children will spit and spudder because of that question. For the love of god if they are little don't do that because they are probally already confused as it is. MOre for the 13 years of age or older.This one is more for the normal people, ones that do not try to beat the hell out of each other or do just right down nasty things to each other. This is for the ones that just found out they should of never been together.

So next is you get your place I'll get mine and we both share time and responsiblty with the child. Common sense most would say. Ok when did emotion and common sense ever enter into the same equation? If your quick you know that answer never. So the person you loved or loved you just looked you in the face and said thats it, thats all ,bye bye. So yes your jumping up for joy, wait, no your not your going through the stages of divorce. Same as death we morn everything death, and so on the same way. We go through stages. The thing with this is well the casulty become the innocent bystanders called your kids.