The Truth about male Spousal Abuse-- A cross sectional review in New Brunswick

Introduction:

In 2004 I was asked by fellow Canadian Advocates of Equal Parenting to do a study on violence perpetrated against males. I did a cross sectional study of all of all organizations that state that they promote non- violent resolutions to family violence in the Province of New Brunswick. This was done via email and phone interviews with internet listed organizations in New Brunswick via a google, meta-crawler and telephone directory search. The questioning was done for phone interviews on the same format and all questions were exact same questioning done with each organization. The questionnaire was done with basic questioning of " Do you offer services for men that have suffered through violence?? If so which services do you provide?" This turned out to be the most dramatic responses from gesturing that "no" we do not offer to threats towards myself. As we know through media and governmental agencies there is over 16 Million dollars given to promote non violent resolutions. The startling fact is it given only to groups in New Brunswick that are female orientated or just for women. In the reference section of this report all direct email responses will be included.

Abstract:

Violence is a 50/50 joint venture perpetrated by males and females was once told to me by a leader of the Windsor's family forum during a meeting in Ottawa; Ontario. The gentleman stated that I would not believe the whole truth but once I discovered by speaking to people throughout the world took it on to find out the truth even if it is as startling as the results will show. The Canadian Charter of Rights and freedoms in Subsection 15(1) of the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms, in effect since April 1985, provides that:

(1) Every individual is equal before and under the law and has the right to the equal protection of the law without discrimination and, in particular, without discrimination based on race, national or ethnic origin, colour, religion, sex, age or mental or physical disability.
This decision was supposed to be an unequivocal decision for human rights for people to be recognized as a human beings under the law. That we as Canadian Citizens should not be discriminated based on sex (gender). The ends that governmental dollars spent to promote non-violent resolution to family violence should be spent equally or proportionately via stats-can reporting if the charter to be held true to its word.

"By one estimate, a man in America is battered every 37.8 seconds. Nationally, about 1.5 million women are victims of domestic violence each year compared to about 835,000 men, according to a 1998 National Violence Against Women Act survey."(1)

"Bear with me as I tell you a true-life example: Last year an Ottawa, Canada, woman got furious at her husband and dialed 911. The police were there in a flash, he was carted out to jail and issued a restraining order. Being penniless, he ended up sleeping in the furnace room of a highrise." (2)

In stats Canada 2004 the highest reporting rate of spousal violence were aged 25 to 34 females and common assault being the highest reported. The highest rate in males being 35 to 44. Female spousal victims more likely to see charges laid by police.

"There are as many violent women as men, but there's a lot of money in hating men, particularly in the United States -- millions of dollars. It isn't a politically good idea to threaten the huge budgets for women's refuges by saying that some of the women who go into them aren't total victims."
-- Erin Pizzey, quoted in David Thomas, Men: Not Guilty.(3)

Her London hotel was picketed by 300 screaming, banner-waving protesters. "I went downstairs and said to one of the policemen,' Why don't you just get rid of them?' And he said "Because we're scared of them." "(4)

This statement by author Erin Pizzey made a very strangling remark of our sociological view point of perpetrated violence in Canada. If the norms of society are challenged then the authors are suppressors or worse re victimizing feminist driven perception of Family violence.

If this is our Canadian perception then the trend will continue especially if there are no places for males to take shelter from these forms of abuse. This report is direct from the fingers of the operators of such shelters and programs. If in New Brunswick the Provincial government does not do any thing to protect victims of violence then why are they allowed to abuse the charter of rights and freedom and only show one side of the story. In the review section all copies of emails are being listed directly from responses received with no alterations.

The generalized statements of " This double standard also contributes to the under-reporting of domestic violence against men. Both men and women are much less likely to think of it as a crime for a woman to hit a man than the other way around." "Men know that there is little support they will receive if they tell others their girlfriends or wives abused them, and are more likely to be ridiculed than taken seriously. Men are expected to take abuse "like a man" and not complain. There are many social messages, which tell us that it is OK for a woman to hit a man. On television, women slapping men in the face or kicking them in the groin is often portrayed as a justifiable act, sometimes even as humour. Rather than thinking that a woman hitting a man is violence, we are led to think, "He must have done something rude to her to deserve being hit." "The physical abuse of children by mothers is yet another example where women have a physical advantage over their victims, and is a rarely acknowledged aspect of domestic violence. " This also leads to the question of is there a male partner in the household that would like to seek refuge against the abuse perpetrated against the child involved in the relationship.

Review:

Do you offer services for men that have suffered through violence?? If so which services do you provide?

Hi Ed,

The RespectED program is focused on prevention of abuse, bullying, and harassment. We provide education to various groups in the community about these issues ( children, youth, parents, adults working with youth etc). Maybe you could give me a call and we could discuss what you were looking for and we could see if there is a fit or I could refer you to other agencies?

I am in the office today and all next week, hope to hear from you soon,

Stacy

Stacy Coy
Community Development Co-ordinator
Atlantic Zone
Canadian Red Cross
(506)674-6218
stacy.coy@redcross.ca
www.redcross.ca (5)
Hi Ed,

Good luck in your information search.

http://app.infoaa.7700.gnb.ca/gnb/pub/DetailOrgEng1.asp?OrgID1=179&DeptID1=88

Anthony Knight

Executive Director / Directeur général

New Brunswick Public Libraries Foundation

Fondation des bibliothèques publiques du Noueau-Brunswick

250, rue King Street, Place 2000, Fredericton, New Brunswick / Nouveau-Brunswick E3B 9M9 Canada

1-800-453-3442 (506) 453-3442 (Phone / Téléphone) (506) 444-4064 (Fax / Télécopieur)

www.librariesfoundation.ca

www.fondationdesbibliotheques.ca(6)



Dear Ed, In response to your questions... we do presentations in the community on family violence, if there is a man in the audience who requires assistance because of his situation we would do whatever we could to help him access services i.e. phone numbers and contacts, also we would give out these numbers if someone calls our emergency line. We do have a number here for a program in Bathurst that we give out...The number is 546-3305 contact name Richard Gallant famille@nbnet.nb.ca also the Mens Network has a variety of names and contacts Terrence Trites in Moncton is in charge of this Committee. We feel family violence is unacceptable in any kind of situation however our services are targeted towards women and their children. You can also call Chimo and they can give you a name of someone in your area...1-800-667-5005. Hope this helps...let me know if you need anything else.
Patty Michaud Director Miramichi Emergency Centre for Women.----- Original Message ----- (7)



Good afternoon Mr. Hoyt,

I am sending you part of the reply to your question since the person that would have more information specifically on adult victims of family violence is presently out until next Tuesday, August 31st. After I speak with her, I will have her get back to you with additional information.

As you are probably aware the Department of Family and Community Services (FCS) offers various services and programs. Depending on the individual case of victims of family violence and their financial situation they could potentially be able to access social assistance and subsidized housing. When applying for subsidized housing if the adult in question states that they are a victim of family violence, they will be identified has having at higher need for subsidized housing and therefore score higher on the need assessment.

For more information on our services you can check our website at the following address: http://www.gnb.ca/0017/index-e.asp.

If this is an emergency situation, the person in question should be calling their local FCS office.

We will be getting back to you next week with more information and thanks for you question.(8)

Barbara Lemieux
Program Consultant/Conseillère
Community and Individual Development/Développement communautaire et individuel
Family and Community Services/Services familiaux et communautaires

Hello Ed,

We do not exclude men from accessing our service, which is to provide support and information to people who are concerned about conflict or violence in a family, marital, dating relationships. I have talked to some men since our service began in 1996, but only a few. In some situations I have built a relationship with them and have seen them regularly for a period of time. Others I have referred to service providers in the community that would be able to meet their particular needs.

Thank you for your interest in our service.

Gwyn Davies

Coordinator, Family Violence Prevention, Eastern PEI(9)



Mr. Hoyt: In response to your question about our services, I have attached below a listing our services, programs and current projects. Our 24 hour crisis line is open to any victim or survivor of sexual violence. Our objective through that line is to provide crisis intervention response and then help connect the caller to appropriate services in the community (i.e. professional counselling options, medical treatment, etc.)



As with many non-profit organizations, especially ours which does not receive program or operational funding from any level of government, we are limited in the programming we are able to offer. With that being said, we are committed to work with every individual who contacts our line to help them determine their needs and link them to those best able to assist them.



If I can provide further information to you or your group, please do not hesitate to contact me.



Lorraine Whalley

Director(10)

Fredericton Sexual Assault Crisis Centre



The Fredericton Sexual Assault Crisis Centre (FSACC) is a grassroots, not for profit community organization whose primary goal is reflected in a commitment to work towards the eradication of sexual violence against women and children. We strive to meet this objective through two broad activities- I) public education and awareness activities; ii) the provision of direct services to those affected by sexual assault.



Established in 1975, FSACC is currently the only rape/sexual assault crisis centre in New Brunswick. Funded by donations, fund-raising activities and program funding from the United Way/ Centraide (Central NB), FSACC does not receive core, operational or program funding from provincial or federal governments.



Successful Programs:



Dating Violence Program

Delivered in New Brunswick high schools classrooms, this program addresses violence in relationships.



Volunteer Crisis Intervention Program

An intensive 40 hour program delivered to women who will respond to the Sexual Assault Crisis Line and provide crisis intervention to survivors of sexual assault and childhood sexual assault.



Sexual Assault Counselling Program

Individual counselling &support groups for female survivors of sexual assault/rape and child sexual abuse.



Self-Protection Program

Groups of women and girl are trained in the awareness of sexual violence, self-esteem, sexual communication, assertiveness and self-defence techniques.



Aware & Supportive Communities

A community-initiated and community-directed program that assists communities in identifying and addressing their sexual assault service needs.



Public Education Program

Members of the centre’s collective attend speaking engagement and workshops to increase awareness about sexual violence.





Community Resources



The Empowerment Project: A train the trainer tool kit for delivering self-protection and assertiveness workshops to women and girls. The Empowerment Project (available in both French and English)is a powerful, flexible, activity-based, and diverse tool kit that trains facilitators to support women and girls as they learn about sexual assault, that they are worth the effort to defend, tools to set and assert their own boundaries, and how to become activists working to end violence against women.





A Community Handbook Increasing Awareness about Sexual Violence and Support for Survivors through Community-Directed Action is a resource based on the work of Aware & Supportive Communities. Available in French and English, this resource is intended to help with community action efforts following a model that has been demonstrated to work in New Brunswick communities. This guide contains:

· a model of an aware and supportive community - indicators

· tips for building a community action group

· tools for assessing a community; creating action plans and evaluating efforts



(In development stage – not yet available....)

Preventing Sexual Aggression in Males: Developing a Train- the -Trainer Tool Kit: This project is aimed at addressing risk factors that may place individuals, specifically males, at risk of becoming involved in sexual assault as aggressors. The development of this flexible and diverse tool kit will provide communities with a diverse and flexible resource to direct crime prevention efforts at males at risk of committing sexual assault.





FREDERICTON SEXUAL ASSAULT CRISIS CENTRE, INC. P.O. BOX 174 FREDERICTON, N.B. E3B 4Y9

CRISIS LINE 454-0437 BUSINESS LINE 454-0460 FAX LINE 457-2780 E-mail: fsacc@nbnet.nb.ca



Perhaps you could let me know why you need us to elaborate on this. It's fairly straightforward.

Simone Leibovitch
Provincial Director
Making Waves/Vague par vague
Phone: (506) 474-1666



I'm not sure that our program is one that need concern you. Our programs are geared to guys and girls.............with equal representation throughout...............from participants to facilitators.
Simone Leibovitch
Provincial Director
Making Waves/Vague par vague
Phone: (506) 474-1666 (11)
----- Original Message -----
Hello,

Thank you for inquiring about our services. We provide information to the general public as a whole, however, we offer our services only to women. For more information you can visit our web page at http://www.thans.ca/casa.html

Suzanne White

Executive Director

Hi Ed,

We have offered our services to men who have experienced violence. For spousal abuse, we offer one-on-one counselling/support and if necessary a temporary place to stay, usually for a few days. We have no long term shelter for them. We also offer our services to men who abuse, this is also one-on-one counselling. And if we cannot assist them, we will refer them to other programs. Jean

Isabelle MacLean [macleaij@gov.ns.ca] (12)

unfortunately, we do not offer services to men...only to women....

Family Services Moncton have several programs for men....you might want to check to see what services they have to offer

you can reach them at famserv@nbnet.nb.ca

Hope this was of help.
gabiecrossroads@nb.aibn.com (13)

Conclusion:

The only respondents that had anything even remotely had anything geared around males of violence was in Nova Scotia and that was not even close to more than a referral agency. The phone interviews were a lot worse and very insulting to anyone of intelligence. I was called a few distasteful names which I will not include in this report but the worse was responses received by police departments in New Brunswick. The worse statement received was a call placed to the dispatch center in Saint John New Brunswick on a work place harassment and uttering of death threats complaint. The female dispatcher when incident was reported of stalking, harassment and death threats response was " what were you doing sleeping with her?" This may be a good reasoning why males might choose not to report violence. The secondary is reason is there is no where for them to turn. Family and Community Services does offer programs for males but for males that are violent nothing for ones that suffer through spousal violence. Section 15 of the charter is to guarantee that we as Canadians male and female are not to be discriminated against on the base of sex. If the charter is to be tested to be true then why are the responses being received biased and non compliant to the charter of Rights and freedoms.

References:

(1) 1998 National Violence Against Women Act survey

(2)January 13, 2003; Eeva Sodhi; A former head of serials cataloging at the University of Ottawa, she lives with her husband in a tiny Ontario village. Copyright © 2003 LewRockwell.com

(3) -- Erin Pizzey, quoted in David Thomas, Men: Not Guilty.

(4) same article _ -- Erin Pizzey, quoted in David Thomas, Men: Not Guilty.

(5)

Stacy Coy
Community Development Co-ordinator
Atlantic Zone
Canadian Red Cross
(6) Stacy Coy Community Development Co-ordinator
Atlantic Zone
Canadian Red Cross


(7) Patty Michaud Director Miramichi Emergency Centre for Women.

(8) Barbara Lemieux
Program Consultant/Conseillère
Community and Individual Development/Développement communautaire et individuel
Family and Community Services/Services familiaux et communautaires


(9) Gwyn Davies
Coordinator, Family Violence Prevention, Eastern PEI


(10) Lorraine Whalley
Director


(11) Simone Leibovitch
Provincial Director
Making Waves/Vague par vague
Phone: (506) 474-1666

(12) Isabelle MacLean [macleaij@gov.ns.ca]

(13) gabiecrossroads@nb.aibn.com



The Truth about male Spousal Abuse- A cross sectional review in New Brunswick; Canada - June 2005 - Edward Hoyt